Puppy for Sale!!

Puppy for sale! Puppy for sale!
One cute tail waggely puppy for sale!

He loves to give kisses and smiles when he **sses
He runs like a gerbil on speed
His black fuzzy hair makes him look like a bear
but he's really to small to be mean

Puppy for sale! Puppy for sale!

One cute tail waggely puppy for sale!

He eats lots of good things and and then a few bad
he chews on the sofa and darn!
when no one was looking he snuck up behind
and grabbed up some needles and yarn!

Puppy for sale! Puppy for sale!

One cute tail waggely puppy for sale!

That stinking cute pup, well I'll tell you what's up
he looked like a walrus agorge
with needles all sticking from out of his mouth
and a swatch in his throat not too large

Puppy for sale! Puppy for sale!

One cute tail waggely puppy for sale!

The cable was strewn all over the floor
in small pieces, purple and forlorn
And boy that cute puppy, that waggely puppy,
well he wished he had never been born

Puppy for sale! Puppy for sale!

One cute tail waggely puppy for sale!

The only small thing that I give thanks for this day
is that while choking and gagging he whined
so the daddy arrived and saved my swatch from inside
that cute waggely puppy's behind!

Puppy for sale! Puppy for sale!
As a matter of fact he's quite cheap
tell you what if you take him I'm sure that I can
pay you with kisses on cheeks!

 

What the Hell were they thinking?

Okay, so, whoever thought that it would be a good idea to have Hallowe'en, a full moon and a time change in the same weekend was NUTS. Granted having them all at the same time probably saves us all weeks of lunacy, children and animals only need to have four days of insanity instead of four weeks.

However the compounded effects of all three within four days is INSANITY, not only are the kids ( and I mean all five of them) hyper and wild but they aren't sleeping either. Hallowe'en was the beginning with lack of sleep due to excitement and afterwards lack of sleep due to sugar crazies, then add a full moon with that incalculable effect on the human body , I mean where do you think the word Lunatic comes from anyway? And then throw in a time change for good measure, not to mention that we had family visiting which just adds to the excitement for the kids and Norah has been sick and teething. OMG, I don't think I've slept in four days.

 We had a midnight bed party last night when Abby had a bladder accident in bed and then a bath and then reading books with both kids while we waited for Bert her toy snake to dry in the dryer. All I could do was laugh as I had a hard time concentrating on the kids with my eyelids closing, something about waking up at 5:30 am with a preschooler demanding food ( which by the way is probably the only way to get me out of bed that early, I wake up for base functions only: food and pee emergencies. Poo emergencies are strictly for the daddy, bless his poo cleaning abilities.)

So we are over the hump, thanks to Mum who bought us loads of pizza last night so I didn't have to cook and thanks to the DVR who let us zone out with hours and hours of taped episodes of Ultimate CakeOff. Pretty well I think that the news shoudl cover this kind of thing previous to it happening:

 " And in other news we have Hallowe'en, a full moon and a time change all in one weekend folks, make sure to stock up on tranquilizers, duct tape, and old episodes of Dora. Call our 24 hour 'I want to strangle my kids and animals hotline- IWTSMKAAH' and don't forget that it is recommended to surreptitously book a babysitter or three to help with the entire weekend. Good luck folks, and remember the national guard will be making residential rounds; giving away free cages and sedatives and the drunk tank at your local PD will be open and accepting the worst of the little buggers. Good luck to you all, and Goodnight"

Just so glad it's over :)